My sweet Angel

Wow, no one could ever describe how it feels to fall in love with your child. Motherhood has been the greatest experience I have ever known. It is so amazing how the soul of a child could effect so many people. Of course everyone who meets Angus falls in love with him, but the joy he brings out of people is the greatest thing to witness.

I love watching people hold him and enjoy him. My mother is now a Nana and my brother is an uncle, my husband a father and I am a mother!!!! I can't wait to have more. I am head over heals in love with AJ, I am so thankful to have him in my life. I just want to be the best mother to him and I want him to have siblings that he can play with and enjoy his whole life.

Christmas was a lot of fun, the little guy was spoiled as expected! He is such a joy. Yes we skipped the newborn sized part of life and jumped into a 10 pound little man stage. He is all muscle and no fat (something that his mama is working toward for herself!) he is able to hold his head up and to push himself up on you. Our little muscle man can stand on your belly, as he pushes our gas!

Justin has been an amazing husband and father. We are going to miss him when he goes back to work next week. He was able to be home for three and a half weeks as Angus came into our lives.

The thing we are working on now is pumping, I am breastfeeding Angus but as a big boy he eats often and right now we are all sick with colds from AJ's first doctor's visit. So sleep is something we are all lacking. I know there are a lot of studies that say to wait 6 weeks before introducing bottles to the baby, but luckily my sons is a sucky boy. He tried to latch on to my mother's face last week! Anyway he is doing well with breast and bottle.

I will try my best to keep you all updated on at least a weekly basis, being a mom as most of you know is the busiest job and the best job ever!

Intoducing Our Little Angel

Eight days ago tonight, I gave birth to my son, Angus Justin St. Pierre (A.J). What a journey this has been, he is so perfect I can't believe he is ours. When I think back to last Monday when my contractions started, I am so amazed at how quickly time has flown bye.

I have had a pretty easy pregnancy compared to many people, however the delivery was the scariest experience of my life. The morning of Monday December 13th at 7:15, I had noticed that I had bright red blood, not a lot but enough for me to go once again to the hospital. I called the nurses to give them a heads up that I was on my way again. My contractions started as we were on our way to the hospital, that whole time I was praying that I did not have to do the walk of shame, as I had been sent home twice before. I was chanting "third time's a charm, third time's a charm...". Finally we arrived, the weather was mild but there was snow and ice on the ground. As I was crossing the street from the parking lot into the entrance I stepped on a piece of ice during a contraction and slipped and landed on my right knee. "superstar!!" Now my non-frumpy soon-to-be mommy look went from nice to covered in mud. It look as if my husband was helping a pregnant street person into the hospital. Anyway, worse things could have happened, I know.

When we arrived in the birthing centre, I met with the nurses that I had become familiar with. Once again I was 3cms, I couldn't believe it. I said to them in my nicest voice possible " I'm 4 days overdue, please. please induce me!!" Of course the answer was 'no we'll have to wait and see'.  Now I have never been bone protruding thin since high school but I was now tipping and breaking the scales at 192.5 lbs. I'm 5'6" this kid was stretching me to the max. So we waited, I was hooked up to the machines and finally around 10:00 am the nurse checked on me again and I was 4 cms! Thank God, they can't send me home now! Justin called my mother gave her my order for pies, 1 Boston Cream for the nurses and 1 Apple Crisp for me once I delivered the baby.

So, I was admitted and the day and contractions continued. Luckily my doctor was staff that day so I didn't have to explain my pregnancy experience again. However this turned out to be bad luck instead of good. My doctor had never sent me for my 32 & 34 week ultrasounds because she insisted that they were not necessary. Each time I asked her in my previous appointments about the expected weight of my baby, she would say "oh normal size, like 7 lbs".

One of the nurses had suggested that I have an ultrasound while I was being admitted. That suggestion would have paid off however it was vetoed by my doctor. I was in active labour for 14 1/2 hours. I tried every position possible that the nurses suggested, birthing ball, slow dancing with my husband ( I couldn't hold my bladder), lying on my sides ( that didn't work I puked all over Justin) and finally crouch over the bed on all fours, just then a group of carolers strolled by singing Christmas songs (that was worse than the pain).

I did not have an epidural because the pain was something felt I could handle. The woman across the hall from me was whaling (like in some Greek Tragedy) she was only 4cms but she insisted on a drug free birth, I was now 8 and not saying more than "ow, ow, ow" every contraction. Once the nurses told me about her dramatics I started chanting "drug her, drug her!!"

However when I was 9cms dilated and my baby had not dropped to where he should be the doctor strongly suggested that I take the epidural so that it would relax my muscles and help the baby pass through. Even though my contractions were at their strongest point I had to bend to a fetal position, stop pushing and stay still while having a needle in my back. (Easier said then done!)

One Week Old!

I was pushing for 3 1/2 hours, there were now 2 doctors and 4 nurses trying to deliver my son. Then the box of tricks came out, they had tried vacuum extraction three times unsuccessfully, then finally forceps.  My God the pain was worse then anything I have ever known. 10:43 pm my son Angus Justin St.Pierre was born 10 lbs 8oz.  If I had the choice, I would have opted for a c-section. The recovery is going to be a long road but it is worth having my son finally in my arms.

Coming out of Hiding

It is December 12th and I have yet to give birth to my little man. The last few days have been quite the experience. I saw my doctor last Wednesday who said that I would definitely be in labour before the weekend. Now this is the third week in a row that this prediction has been made by her. I'm beginning to think she has a hard time with picking lottery numbers as well. It is also the second week in a row that she has tried to help me naturally induce by attempting to lightly strip my membrane. But the reason that I have not been online is because of her last piece of magic and great advice... CASTOR OIL!!! Now I have always avoided this ridiculous tactic but when you've tried EVERYTHING else, desperation sinks in and I listened to my doctor. That was Wednesday morning, I could barely walk that night and felt horrible. I have been in pain since day one of my pregnancy due to the baby's position on my sciatic nerve, I know many women have been through worse which is why I usually never blog about my pain but oh lord Wednesday brought pain up to a new level for me.

On the bright side I know about 90% of the nursing staff on both day and night shifts at the hospital that I will one day birth my son. I have been on the phone with these amazing women and I had to visit the hospital Thursday morning as well as Friday due to Wednesday's stupidity. My son is healthy and strong which makes me so happy, but I would love to hold him in my arms.

The hardest thing is that I am in pain from the weight that I am carrying, I can not remember when I was last comfortable. Luckily the latest they will let me wait is Wednesday/Thursday. Since the doctor at the hospital knows I have tried everything his suggestion on Friday was for me to do absolutely nothing.  Oh the other part to Friday was that I realized that the more kids you have the more worries you have. My brother was sent to a hospital on the other side of Montreal for severe food poisoning and was hoping that I would not find out so that he didn't 'steal my thunder'. Can you imagine my poor mother at work waiting by the phone to find out how her kids were doing as we were both under observation in hospitals half an hour away from each other at the same time.

Anyway all that to say I am still waiting and just trying to grin and bear it. I can not stretch any further as I will fall forward from the weight.  Here's a picture from Thursday's hour outdoor walk before our 3 hour mall walk, all after the first hospital visit.  

Two Days...TODAY!!!!!!

The last 48 hours has brought A LOT of snow. So much snow that I have people calling me to request that I do not have the baby in this crazy weather. Let me just say that anyone who knows me, knows that I am a drama mama. If I have to call the firemen to come over to get me to the hospital, I will do so, after I put on some make-up of course. I am purposely making random messes in my house so that I can clean them up. I think I have stage one cabin fever...jumping in the snow and making snow angels looks so appealing, if I had someone to pull me up I would definitely be outside in the yard looking like a crazy penguin.

One of my good friends and mommy mentor stopped by last night to lend us her beautiful bassinet that she had used for all four of her kids. It is a classic, Disney-perfect piece of furniture that is so special and warm. You can feel the memories and imagine your own as you stare at it. Once again Angus has been spoiled by the love of others; what a lucky boy.

I have been watching Christmas movies and any baby show that I can find. I feel that I am addicted to crying, really why else would I do this to myself. I used to be extremely paranoid about every little unknown that could happen with pregnancy, and honestly I still am not 100% settled but I have to just leave it up to my higher power to get me through this last leg of the race. It is so hard for some one like me to relax and let go of control. (yes I have control issues, but if you know me, you knew that!)

I have experienced pre-labour and have actually thought that I was finally getting some where but that was last week and I am still two people today. I am enjoying this alone time with my son for now but I would enjoy it if I could put him in his daddy's arms from time to time. My bed has turned into a collection of pillows, yes I have the wonderful preggo-body pillow but I am to the point where I have to turn from side to side because the extra weight on my joints hurts so much, all that to say lots of pillows are in my bed...poor Justin.

I never thought that I would miss working out but what I would give to be able to do crunches again or just to touch my toes with out holding my breath. Two days are left until my due date. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and you can bet that I will be bribing her to set me free!! AJ has loads of outfits that he needs to wear, so the sooner I can get him in them the better. I'm being realistic, this child of mine is not going to be a low-birth weight baby, all of his newborn and 0-3 months outfits might not even fit.

If the bribing doesn't work, I will be blogging with an update :)

The Christmas Tree Is Up and I'm Waiting For My Angel

Where did November go? Don't get me wrong, I am very happy to welcome December but I was sure that November had just started. Oh well, the days are passing quickly.

My new state of mind is slowly sinking in. I am happy, healthy and waiting for my little prince to arrive. Although I found myself whining to my husband about my sore hips, pancake butt, hot dog fingers and my massive moon face; I did have to say that I have been blessed because my feet are still size 8 and I do not suffer from cankles (fat ankles). Things can always be worse, I am honoured to be experiencing the most amazing miracle life has to offer.

I keep a lamp on in Angus' nursery during the evenings just so that I can picture the love and happiness that will be overflowing A.J while he naps. The most touching aspect of my pregnancy has been how much love and generosity people have shared with Justin and I as we prepare for our first born son. It's hard to be negative when you're surrounded by so much positive. There are many people who are not as fortunate and we feel that it is so important for A.J to know how lucky he really is.


I just wanted to say a huge thank you to everyone for checking in to my blog to see how we are doing. I am forever grateful for the beautiful comments and feedback we have received. The time you have taken out of your life to check on us is really appreciated. I will keep posting as A.J arrives and will post pictures as they come. But from the bottom of our hearts thank you for being you and helping me through this amazing ride. Christmas will never be the same, I can't imagine a greater gift.